Or: how to find extremists everywhere
“Coming out of the mosque after the sermon, I immediately felt like becoming a suicide bomber. Very effective sermon, eh?”
Those remarkable words were stated on Friday by Zaparudin Abdul Rahim, who sells Korean apparel online, and fancies himself as a media critic. He’s now enjoying newfound fame in all leading Umno newspapers and websites for having gone to the police to accuse political commentator Mariam Mokhtar of sedition.
He’s enjoying the publicity. “Not easy to get in the papers, you know,” he said on Facebook, after posting images of Berita Harian and Kosmo. “Frame them up, for the grandkids,” he said.
On Friday, though, grandkids were far from his mind.
Tajuk khutbah Jumaat dekat Shah Alam hari ni
“Kesejahteraan Ummah dengan Dakwah”
“Kesejahteraan Ummah dengan Dakwah”
Lepas habis Jummat, keluar masjid saya terus rasa nak jadi seorang pengebom berani mati. Terkesan sungguh khutbah tadi eh?
The next day, after being alerted to Mariam’s article on Free Malaysia Today, he began preparations to report her for sedition. Maybe that’s another way of becoming a suicide bomber.
Was he being serious about suicide bombing? Was he being sarcastic? Was he trying to give effusive praise to the imam? Was he trying to act tough? Or only trying to get attention?
But the way he said it is starkly similar to Eric Paulsen’s remark on Twitter a week ago. But instead of praise in Umno media, Eric’s remark riled up the Inspector-General of Police so much that he ordered Eric’s immediate arrest.
Arrested for poor syntax
The man who put the words “extremism” and
“Jakim” in the same sentence. Tut, tut
Oh dear. Struck by Eric’s poor command of English and atrocious syntax, the IGP (or some Umno cybertrooper, or some religious nutter) immediately labelled it “biadap”, using an image that apparently was lifted: from an Umno cybertrooper web site? or provided by a Special Branch black operative? Who knows?
It was good enough for the IGP. Eric must be arrested.
Because Eric said IGP is human rights enemy No 3?
Just for one silly tweet of 140 characters or less? Or because Eric had listed the IGP as one of the top 5 Enemies of Human Rights in Malaysia?
Or because of deaths in police custody?
Oh. Because ‘biadab’ means sedition
The police, Umno’s pencacai, the religious thought police and right-wing religious and racist kooks all sing the same hymn. Very piously. And also suing for libel. If you can’t shut him up by locking him up maybe squeezing him for money might work, they seem to think. It’ll look good in the Umno media with headlines galore and maybe some air time.
Frame it up for the grandkids, as Mr Zapa said. Why not? But what if the grandkids, in 40 years’ time, having never lived under Umno thought control, are horrified that grandpa was an instrument of totalitarian repression? Perish the thought. One can show off the framed-up articles to the “geng” and bask in their admiration.
Sarcasm is now an arrestable offence
Obviously, these people have choosen not to believe that Eric could have been, or actually was, just a wee bit sarcastic. Better buat bodoh and treat it deadpan as fact.
Well, that brings us back to Mr Zapa.
Using the same logic, and with due care for syntax, one can immediately deduce the fact that the words “Friday sermon” and the words “suicide bomber” were used by Mr Zapa in the same sentence. Mr Zapa says he was convinced by the Friday sermon into wishing to become a suicide bomber.
That’s a bit much for a loving family man who likes to post selfies and food photos and the occasional worshipful praise of Muhyiddin Yassin. That’s going to the extreme. Being an extremist even (especially in praising Muhyiddin). Mr Zapa had in that instant become an extremist. And it’s because of a sermon, he said.
Now, what was it Eric had said on Twitter?
But never mind. Mr Zapa has friends in Special Branch. He has filed a sedition report against Mariam Mokhtar. Maybe the SB had coached him? Who knows. But we know the IGP doesn’t like Mariam. He even said in public: “She’d better watch out, or we will go after her”. And now somebody has followed through, to “go after her”. You see?
So it’s all right to use ‘May 13′ then?
So who will go after Abdul Hadi Awang, or Utusan Malaysia and Awang Selamat, just some of those putting the words “May 13″ and “Chinese domination” and “DAP” in the same sentence?
Syntax police must keep their eyes peeled for irregular verbs, it seems.
And what about Utusan Malaysia and Awang Selamat who regularly harp on Chinese domination, “May 13″ and how Lim Kit Siang single-handedly started the race riots of 1969 all even though it was the Umno-Alliance government that had lost Penang, was in a minority in Selangor, and was hanging in the balance in Perak?
Following the IGP’s logic, Hadi is taking an extremist view. Since he’s PAS president, it must follow that PAS is an extremist party. Similarly, using Isma logic and IGP logic, it follows that Utusan Malaysia and Awang Selamat are also extremists.
Indeed, there are extremists everywhere you look.
For people in power, my extremism good, your extremism bad.
It’s extremely simple. Devilishly so.